30 Super-Cool Inventions The World Needs Right Now

  1. Shazam for people’s faces
  2. A safe and reliable wingsuit (so we can all fly like birds)
  3. A wingsuit for your cat (so you can fly with your cat)
  4. A cat-suit for your bird
  5. Portable soundproof rooms for drumming – so electric drums can go back to hell and stay there
  6. A fork that dispenses melted cheese
  7. A phone that displays your contacts with accurate relationship measures like on The Sims (to see who really loves you)
  8. A TV that tells you when people you personally know will be on
  9. Sonar equipment to map out ant nests
  10. Praying mantis translators to hear it’s prayers
  11. A microwave for drying clothes (washing, hanging and waiting makes me feel colonial)
  12. Flying bicycles
  13. An app that displays what, how many, and where all living things in your house are
  14. A plug-in that forwards all landline calls to the appropriate mobile phone
  15. A umbrella the shape of your car door to eliminate awkward umbrella closing
  16. The ability to leave trademe-like reviews of other drivers
  17. Traffic information regarding lines at the clubs (heavy westbound full of 18 year old douchebags into Snapdragon)
  18. An app that tells you if your food will give you food poisoning
  19. An alarm if someone you will see during the day is wearing the same clothes as you
  20. An app that calculates how sunburnt you’re about to get
  21. A machine that covers your roof in tin and rains on itself until you fall asleep
  22. A fridge with different fingerprint-locked compartments so errbody can stop stealing my peanut butter cups
  23. A bar where the seats randomly change every-so-often so you are forced to meet new people
  24. A door that lights up if whatever noise you are making can be heard from outside (so you can stop hearing your flatmate’s girlfriend whale on)
  25. A hand dryer that actually dries my fucking hands
  26. A digital license plate that shows how many accidents and/or near misses you’ve had, and how long you’ve been driving
  27. An interactive map that shows when and where people will be driving, so you’ll get a free ride every now and again
  28. Glasses that can zoom in
  29. An alarm if you are about to shake someone’s hand who hasn’t washed theirs in a while…
  30. Last but not least, not so much an invention, but wouldn’t it be cool if at the mall, one person’s phone was randomly selected each hour and you got to play your music to everyone. Ever so quietly in the background, but you became the DJ. This way I could spread the good word of Jason Mraz even faster. 

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